Do you sometimes get feelings of doubt or uncertainty when you make decisions? Are you one of those people, who spend hours debating over an idea in your mind before finally coming to a final conclusion? Do you hate making decisions? If you are nodding right now, then this video is definitely for you. In today’s video, we are going to discuss decision making, and give you nine tips, which you can use to be a confident and better decision maker. But first, let me introduce you to Sara, a 22 year-old lady currently taking a degree in business management. Prior to pursuing business management, Sara was an architecture student. Right from childhood and into adulthood, Sara never made any significant decisions for herself.
It is Our Choices that Show What We Truly are Far More Than Our Abilities.
In fact, pursuing architecture was her family’s choice since she could join her Uncle’s architecture firm. From a tender age, Sara lived under her parents’ care and control. She styled her hair in a tight ponytail manner to please her mother, even though she liked letting her hair down. She got perfect grades in school, to please her strict father, who be furious if she got nothing less than an A. When Sara joined campus, suddenly she had plenty of freedom from her parents, but still she found herself in another cycle where her friends made all choices and decisions for her. She would join them for parties because they insisted, eat pizza because they insisted on it, and watched movies they liked. Sara attended all classes and passed her tests because she did not want to disappoint her father. Everything worked out well until Sara attended a conference themed “Careers and Decision making” in her college and realized that she had been living other people’s lives.
Good Leaders Make Good decisions.
It was at that point that Sara sat down and reflected on her life. For the first time in her life, Sara made a choice for herself. She took a one-year vacation and quit Architecture against her parents wishes. Majority of her classmates who genuinely enjoyed architecture also asked her to stay, but Sara knew that she did not share their enthusiasm. She decided to explore businesses world during her vacation. She interned with different companies and explored different aspects of businesses to see which she enjoyed the most. After returning home, Sara decided to pursue a course in business management. However, before making her decision, Sara learnt several lessons along the way which I am going to share with you in this video Sometimes, the good choices we make may have negative outcomes. Therefore, the idea of decision-making is increasing the odds that you make more good decisions and not to try and avoid making decisions. This can be achieved by having a decision-making model, especially for big decisions.
Good Decisions Don’t Make Life Easy, but They Do Make it Easier.
The first step Sara took was to separate herself from the problematic environment and give herself space to observe her life. Zooming out of a situation enables you to watch yourself as if you are the movie and observe each of your decisions for what they truly are. By taking a break from architecture, Sara noticed that she made the decision to be an architect because her family insisted. She also realized that her taste in style and food was heavily influenced by her friends. By zooming out of her situation, Sara realized that she needed to start making her own choices. Tip 2: Define the Problem Upon observation, Sara realized that the problem was not any of her friends’ or her parents’ opinions, but her inability to make her choices and stand by them. From a tender age, Sara was comfortable with her parents making all her choices only to realize how dependent she was once she joined college. By defining her inability to make decisions, Sara could finally work on the problem and quit worrying. Take some time and define why you have trouble making decisions for yourself. Maybe you have controlling parents like Sara. Maybe you have low self-esteem or perhaps you are too afraid to take risks.
Success People Are Good at Separating Needs From Wants.
Identify and Weigh the Criteria While rethinking her career, Sara made a list of all the things she considered crucial to her decision. For example, she knew that her parents were important because she needed their support. However, she was also aware of their dominance over her life. She also wanted to be independent with her choices and she wanted a career she enjoyed. She once worked under management in her father’s company and was enthusiastic about making business decisions. Sara then weighed all the factors and decided which were more important. In the process she realized that despite wanting her parents support, she needed to be in a career that she enjoyed even more. This meant that despite her parents’ feelings towards her choice, Sara was determined to fight for her choice. Consult Different People During her one-year vacation, Sara had the opportunity to interact with different entrepreneurs and employees. She used the opportunity to listen to the criteria behind their career choices. After consulting several people, Sara realized that she was not only responsible for her career choice, but also for her happiness. Majority of the people who enjoyed their careers made the decision for themselves, and not for their families or friends.
How to Make The “right” Decission.
It may be easy for you to stay in a situation because other people are pleased, but you need to ask yourself if you are happy with the decision. Tip 5: List your Alternatives, Weigh Them and Decide When faced with a problem, it is crucial to list all your alternatives before choosing one. For Sara, completing a degree in architecture and excelling as an architect was an option even if she felt that her parents influenced the choice heavily. Sara also had the option to quit architecture against her parents’ wishes and pursue business management and be genuinely happy in the long run. In the end, Sara realized that she alone had to bear the consequences of her decisions. Even with all the assurance in the world, Sara was sure that she would not be content as an architect. Since her future happiness was more important than her parents’ opinion about her career choice, Sara quit architecture for business management.
Does the value of your decision outweigh the cost?
If yes, pick the alternative that provides more value. If not, do not pick that alternative. Quit Being a Perfectionist Being a perfectionist will prevent from making your own decisions. The reality of perfectionism is that you will be weighed down by the thought of making the wrong decision, which leads to feelings of anxiety when you think you have made the wrong decision. Making any decision comes with an amount of risk. Sara could have chosen to quit pursuing business management because she could fail and her parents would have the last laugh. But she was aware of the risk she was taking and did it anyway, of course after making her calculations. You need to embrace the risk you are taking and make the decision anyway. Change your career while you still have time. Start your business even if you do not have the perfect plan. Launch your online business and lean more along the way. You may face surprises and failures along the way. And at that point, you can change your decision and take a different path. Avoid being afraid of failure and you will definitely make more choices than you are making now. Make Small Decisions a Routine Successful people make routines out of small choices. For instance, Mark Zuckerberg is famous for wearing his grey t-shirts and hoodies, even to important meetings. Steve Jobs is famous for wearing black turtlenecks while Barrack Obama stated that he cut down his official dress code to grey or blue suits.
Why did each of these people define their looks?
They have numerous important decisions to think about. While perhaps you cannot show up for work looking like Mark Zuckerberg or Steve Jobs, you can definitely create routine out of some choices. You see, making decisions is like exercising a muscle. After making too many decisions in one day, the muscle tires out, leaving you exhausted and leading to poor choices. By creating a routine, you will preserve your mental energy and save it for more important decisions.
You Can’t Make Good Decisions If They Come From a Bitter Heart”.
Do not Make Decisions when you are Hungry, Tired or Emotional Making decisions when you are tired or hungry might lead to rushed choices. In these states, you are more concerned with doing away with the decision rather than weighing the risks. Do not make important decisions when you are tired or sleepy. Instead, postpone the decision until after you have eaten or rested. This goes for emotions too. You are more likely to make wrong and rushed decisions when you’re highly emotional. Being too anxious, angry, sad, or happy will cloud your judgment and increase your chances of making a poor decision. Set a Time Limit Lastly, remember to set a time limit for major decisions. You need to create enough time to weigh your options, but not take too long that you end up postponing the decision entirely. For instance, Sara set out one year to explore businesses before making her decision. She took an entire year to make the decision because it gave her enough time to consult different entrepreneurs, intern in different companies and learn. However, if you are making a decision on what to wear on a date, you probably don’t need more than 30 minutes. Do not prolong the decision for so long that you are unable to focus but also avoid setting so little time that you end up being anxious. Set a time limit and have a decision by the deadline.